Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Repairing The Inside

Well, I've gone and done it now .....

I signed up for a half marathon course!

I'm still having a hard time committing to running, but have finally decided that my current methods (eating, vegging out, crying, not sleeping, worrying, etc.) of dealing with the stress in my life just really do NOT work for me.  Huh ... go figure!  Somehow through all of that I do not feel any less stressed, and likely more. <----sarcasm at it's finest!

Last week I made the decision to check out what upcoming clinics there might be and, amazingly, there was a half marathon clinic starting up within the next week.  I knew I had to go for it, immediately, without thinking about it.  I drove straight to the store and signed up before I could talk myself out of it.

To be honest, I'm not sure if I'll be able to handle it, but I've been assured that I can drop down to a 10K clinic if need be, which is a lot easier than moving up to the half.  I wanted the challenge of the half and also it's a longer clinic, so a longer commitment from me, which is what I need.  I like being able to comfortably run the around a half distance on a regular basis.

We've had a bit of a heat spell here the last week so I really haven't got out much, but yesterday morning I eventually kicked my arse out the door and went for a run.  It was much too hot as I left too late, but I did it.  I did 7Km at a slow pace with extended walk breaks in between.  I'm really hoping there are some other very slow people in my group.

It was probably the most therapeutic thing I have done in a long time.  Just me, and the road, and my thoughts.  I let the tears flow when the going got tough, and I continued on.  If that ain't a life lesson, I don't know what is.

My new journey has begun, to a happier, healthier, more stable Heidi than I've been in a long time.  This is the first time I've approached this journey from the mental standpoint.  Previously it's been to lose weight, to get healthier, to be faster or achieve a certain goal.



Syl said...

I'm so proud of you for taking that step Heidi! you are going to do fantastic!

Fran said...

I'm happy to read a new post of you Heidi. And I too am proud you took this step and like Syl I know you are going to be great.

You won't have to step down to that 10K clinic, you are going to nail the half marathon clinic!

Good luck and again, it's good to hear from you again.

Lynsey said...

Good for you for getting back at it. Can't wait to hear about your training.

Missy said...

So happy to hear from you again - but sad for you that life seems to be pretty challenging right now. Good for you for taking steps towards a healthier you! You can do this!!